A Wedding in Tuscany and the Preparation to Get There!

Our nephew is getting married to his lovely fiancé next weekend on an estate in Tuscany, Italy.  Bob, my brother-in-law, sister-in-law, niece and I are first heading to Paris and then on to Normandy to learn about the area’s importance during World War Two—-a bucket-list check-off for us all. 

But this blog is not about sightseeing or the military tactics used on D-Day. It’s about all the preparation that has gone into being ready for what I can only describe as the event of the season—at least for our family.  

Our nephew Brendan is marrying a woman whose family is from India, and as a consequence, much of the three day celebration will reflect a traditional Indian wedding.  We are all so excited to be part of these wonderful wedding traditions so different from our own families.  For example, I doubt that the Tarantella (my side of the family) will be played and danced to and nor will we hear a  haunting rendition of “Danny Boy” sung by some “over-served” family member on Bob’s side. That said, preparing for three days of outfits has not been easy. Below is what we have had to plan for to ensure that we were ready for each day’s event:

Day 1: The Henna Gathering and Welcome Dinner:  I am not sure who will be part of the Henna Gathering, but we were told to wear white, cream or beige for the dinner.  Fortunately for me, I found a lovely white sundress on sale at Talbot’s End-of-Summer Sale.  Unfortunately, there were apparently no dresses in my size left in the entire United States, but it was such a deal that I bought the next size, which was luckily at the store I was actually shopping in and then had it altered.  Bob had more difficulty.  Initially, he was going to wear a beige pair of pants and a white Oxford shirt but was he concerned that people at the dinner might confuse him with  “The Good Humor Man” and ask him for a Toasted Almond or Strawberry Shortcake bar.  On a whim, I looked on Amazon and found a beige suit for him for only $82!  Bob was immediately suspect due to the low price but I said that if it looked terrible or was cheap- looking, we would just return it.  It arrived—of course— the next day.  Bob tried it on, it fit and he was quite excited about the suit and how he looked in it until my sister, who was visiting for a few days told him he looked like Sonny Crockett from “Miami Vice!” He’s wearing it anyway…Sonny be damned.

Day 2: The Symbolic Wedding Ceremony and the Sangeet: I’m not sure what either of these ceremonies are, but I do know that I can wear the same outfit to both of them. Both events are semi-formal and I started and ended my shopping by going in my closet and finding a black cocktail dress that I had completely forgotten about.  

Day 3: The Muhurthan Ceremony and the Black Tie Reception: It was recommended that we wear traditional Indian wedding attire to the morning Muhurthan Ceremony and appropriate Western black tie clothes for the evening’s festivities. As I knew that there was no way I would “find” a sari in my closet as I did with my cocktail dress, a trip to a sari store was necessary. I talked to a dear friend who knew of a town nearby that had store-after-store of saris for sale and away I went. 

My first mistake was going by myself, as I had absolutely no idea what I was looking for.  My second mistake was doing no research on what one of these outfits cost.  In the first store I entered, I asked the saleswoman if she would show me dresses appropriate for an Indian wedding. She immediately pulled out an outfit that had a skirt, a wrap and a shirt that showed my midriff.  I told her “no” to this style as I had had three children and no one wanted to see my belly—not even me. I tried a few others that I thought looked more like pajamas than wedding wear. (However, my midriff was covered in all). I finally tried on one lovely outfit that was a beautiful raspberry color and covered me in all the objectionable areas.  She told me it was on sale but I thought that there were about 50 other stores in a three block radius of the changing room I was currently standing, so I thought I should keep looking.  

I didn’t want to move the car, so I guiltily sneaked into the store immediately next door. But I only stayed there for a few minutes because I couldn’t take all the strong-arming from my sales person. She showed me more pajama-like outfits and several ill-fitting ensembles, all of which she said could be fixed, mended or be taken in in a snap.  I said thanks, but no thanks and immediately went back and bought the raspberry outfit. 

And then there’s the black tie event. In 2019, when looking for a gown for my son’s wedding, I found this glamorous, form-fitting royal blue number that looked great on and I thought I could wear it to another wedding we had the next year.  But that was 2019.  In 2024, that dress just doesn't look the same…on me. I don’t know what happens as women age, but things just start…shifting and I am no exception. And the proof of my personal shifting was evident when I tried on that gown. To solve this problem,  I knew that I needed to call in the fashion cavalry…my daughter. She told me that if I wanted to smooth out the lumps, I should order something from “Honeylove,” as their motto is “Where function meets fashion.” I ordered something that my daughter assured me would de-lumpify me from my upper abdomen to my knees. I was feeling upbeat until I actually received and then attempted to try on my Honeylove shapewear.  All I can say is that with all the pushing and pulling to get that thing on, I felt neither the “honey” nor the “love.”

Now that I have all my requisite outfits ready and packed, my next problem will be tomorrow, when I put my suitcase on the scale at the airport. If it weighs in over the maximum weight allowed, I may be willing to lighten things up by leaving my new shapewear behind. My lumps be damned.